Feeling stressed, depressed, or under pressure is a natural part of life, and it’s easy to fall into the trap of seeking medical treatment to suppress these emotions. In today’s world, where advertisements constantly bombard us with messages telling us to “talk to our doctor,” it seems like the most sensible course of action. But what if, instead of trying to squash these feelings, we learned to use them as a means for personal growth?
Take the fascinating example of the humble lobster, as told by Rabbi Dr. Abraham Twersky. He explains that a lobster is a soft, mushy creature that resides within a rigid shell. The shell does not change or expand, so how does the lobster grow? As it begins to outgrow its shell, the lobster experiences significant discomfort and pressure. It then finds a safe place beneath a rock formation, casts off the restricting shell, and forms a new one. This process of growth and transition happens multiple times throughout its life.
The key takeaway here is that stress and discomfort are valuable triggers for the lobster’s growth. Suppose lobsters sought medical treatment for their discomfort, receiving prescriptions that made them feel fine. In that case, they’d never feel the necessity to leave their restrictive shells, resulting in them never growing. So, how can we apply this concept to our own lives?
Recognizing Stress as a Signal for Growth
Rather than merely seeking to rid ourselves of stress and adversity, it’s essential to acknowledge them as signals for change. Allow yourself to embrace this change and grow from it, rather than reverting to medicine to numb your natural instincts. Navigating and understanding the sources of our stress can be broken down into four essential steps.
- Identify the stressor: Pinpoint the source of your stress, whether it’s a particular event, person, or situation. Knowing what’s causing your discomfort can provide clarity and help you create a plan to tackle it.
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Accept the situation: Accept that you cannot always control everything in life. Learning to let go of things outside your control can reduce anxiety and the pressure we put on ourselves. Focus on what you can change, rather than what you cannot.
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Develop coping strategies: Find healthy ways to manage and release stress, such as engaging in physical activities, practicing mindfulness, or speaking with a trusted friend or family member. Curating your toolbox of coping mechanisms can provide you with valuable resources during times of stress.
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Learn and grow: Reflect on the situation and the stress it caused, and identify any lessons you can glean from the experience. Use these lessons to drive personal growth, embrace change, and emerge stronger.
Additional Benefits of Embracing Stress
Understanding and working through stress not only promotes personal growth but can also offer numerous physical and mental health benefits. According to research from The American Psychological Association, when we perceive stress as potentially helpful, our bodies respond more healthily to it. This perception can lower our risk of chronic stress, heart disease, and other stress-related complications.
Additionally, Psychology Today states that stress can sharpen our cognitive skills, improve our decision-making abilities, enhance memory, and stimulate the growth of new neurons in the brain. Embracing stress and learning to navigate difficult situations can help improve our cognitive and emotional intelligence, making us better equipped to handle future hardships.
Example of a Stress-Growth Scenario
Imagine you’re a young professional offered a promotion at work. The promotion would lead to an increased workload and responsibilities that might initially feel overwhelming. Rather than succumb to the stress and pressure, take time to identify the source of your concerns and accept that change is inevitable. Develop healthy coping mechanisms, such as exercising, seeking mentorship, or engaging in relaxation techniques. Learn from the experience and embrace the personal growth that comes with overcoming adversity. In the end, you might find that your stress response helped you succeed in your new role, emerging as a stronger, more capable individual.
In Conclusion
Instead of giving in to the temptation of chasing away stress and adversity with medication, think of those feelings as opportunities for growth and self-improvement. Take inspiration from the lobster, which uses the discomfort of its restrictive shell to shed its old self, adapt, and grow. Embrace change, learn from the challenges life throws your way, and come out stronger and more resilient. Your mental and physical health will thank you.
